The Early Years
I was born on Saturday, January 17th, 1970 at 7:17 AM into a very loving and caring Roman Catholic family.
Our parents are Rita and Paul Arling. Throughout our entire lifetimes, they’ve been there for us, through good times and adversities. I am the fifth of six children in my immediate family. My eldest sibling is P.J. (Paul Jay), born in May of 1960, he was born on our Mother’s 22nd birthday. Then comes Pamela, born in June 1961. Then Rita Lynn was born in July 1962. Kimberly was born in November 1965. Myself, as I’ve already mentioned, January of 1970, and then comes last but most certainly not least, Matthew, born in November of 1977. My parents are especially fortunate that the Lord has blessed them with six wonderful children. (Now grown, mature adults.)
While we were growing up, we were raised in a part of Cincinnati, Ohio called Delhi Township, on a street titled Riverama Drive. I loved living there because it was such a fun place in which to be raised. Our neighborhood was a great place to grow up in. There were a lot of other kids my siblings and my age to play around with. Our house was at the end of the cul-de-sac and had a basketball hoop, we all had fun with that. Since we lived on a dead-end street, it was very convenient for us to have block parties and sleepouts, which is precisely what we did during the summertime. Our house had a vacant lot next to it, so, it was very easy for us to do that. One time there were 16 tents camped out there. We likewise had a woods that my friends and I played in and we also would go down to the creek and hang out.
When my Mom was still pregnant with me, my Dad became a Catholic Big Brother to Bob and Vince, whose Father passed away when they were youngsters. My Dad would pick them up on Sundays, bring them to my parent’s house to spend the day, and also have dinner with us. As I became a grade-schooler and whenever they didn’t come over, I’d always ask, “Where are Bob and Vince?” My Dad could have easily said, “I’m too busy with four children, and another one coming soon,” but he did it anyway and I truly admire my father for doing this because he most definitely influenced their lives. Some 50+ years later my parents still have a close relationship with them. We continue to get together with their families either once or twice a year. Bob and Vince have many fond memories of their relationship with my parents and my siblings.
While I was attending preschool at Mount St. Joseph, I would wear a different hat to school practically every day, and one of the sisters there nicknamed me The Hat Boy. Also, while attending MSJ, I was unable to skip, so, I had to work on that but now I'm a great skipper.
The day Matthew came home from the hospital after he was born, I made a sign at school for him, when I was in second grade, saying, “Welcome home, Matthew.” When Matt was a two-year-old, I taught him how to ride a two-wheeled bicycle that was named RACY RABBIT.
During the Spring of 1977, when I was seven years of age, I went with my Dad's side of the family to the annual Reds Luncheon downtown Cincinnati held at the Cincinnati Club. This event always took place the day after the Red's Opening Day. Davey Concepcion, an amazing shortstop from The Big Red Machine, was at our table. Davey asked me if I had a perm. I answered him by saying, "No, it's all natural." He could hardly believe me because my tresses were so curly back then. Our picture, with Davey and my entire family, including my immediate family, aunts, uncles, cousins, and Grandparents Arling and my Mom’s parents Grandparents Martin, along with a lengthy article ended up on the front page of The Cincinnati Enquirer that year.
While attending grade school at Our Lady of Victory, I was a straight “A” student. Besides that fact, I likewise was an outstanding athlete. I played three different sports during my grade school years: soccer, which I thoroughly enjoyed; basketball, which I certainly liked a lot; and baseball, not that much. (Two out of three isn’t too bad.)
I had a wonderful childhood; being a straight ‘A’ student and an outstanding athlete made life very easy for me.
I have to acknowledge that I wasn't always perfect. During the summer of 1984, one of my friend's older brother would provide us with beer, and we would drink in the woods. Then, I would ride my bicycle, wearing NO helmet, back home with a buzz. When I think back on that, I have to admit that was quite a stupid thing on my part to do.
Summer of 1984
The summer of 1984 was going particularly well for me. There were 100 boys who tried out for the 18 spots on St. Xavier’s freshmen soccer team and I was one of those 18 chosen. My life was going perfectly prior to Sunday, August 26th of that year.
On that fateful date, the day prior to when I was supposed to start school at St. X, I attended a company picnic, during which they had a friendly softball game. The game was going fine until when I was up to bat. The ball was pitched to me, I swung, hit the ball, and, while running towards first base, I was struck on the left side of my head by the thrown ball. I was rushed to Cincinnati Children's Hospital Medical Center (CHMC) and immediately placed in the intensive care unit.
The swelling in my brain began to rise, so, the doctors placed me into a barbiturate coma in hopes that the swelling would come down. However, this did not happen, so, the doctors had to perform surgery on my brain to remove a blood clot caused by the blow.
After my surgery, I remained in my coma for between two to two and a half months. During those months, my family received grim news. The doctors said that, if I did awaken from my coma, I most likely would never be able to speak, or understand language, and likewise be paralyzed on the left side of my body. If this wasn't bad enough news, while I was in my coma, I suffered a stroke in my visual area and was left with right-side peripheral blindness in both of my eyes. After the doctors told them that terrible news, my family and friends vigorously prayed together that everything would work out.
While I was still in the ICU of CHMC, and still in my coma, my sister-in-law Gwen's brother-in-law, Dr. Lee, an orthopedic doctor, made boots for both of my feet to prevent my feet from dropping. (Thank you, Lee.) Lee also visited and checked up on me daily while I was still in the ICU.
During my third day in the ICU, my Mom asked a nurse if I should wear a support hose to prevent me from developing blood clots. Her reply was, "No, 14-year-olds don't get blood clots." WRONG, the next day, sure enough, I did indeed develop blood clots in both of my legs. Also, while in the ICU, my Dad suggested to a nurse that I should have an egg crate mattress to prevent me from developing bedsores. The nurse replied back by saying, "That's a good idea." My Dad wrote down her name in a journal that he kept for me. Well, guess what? That egg crate mattress was there immediately. When you can't advocate for yourself, you need somebody else to advocate for you and I was extremely fortunate that Our Lord Jesus Christ, has blessed me with the world's greatest parents and siblings to advocate for me when I was unable to do that for myself.
After I came out of my comatose state the first word that came out of my mouth was Dad, then I said Mom, then I SCREAMED for FOOD. Also, nobody could get me to walk after I came out of my unconscious state but my eldest sister, Pam, thought of a brilliant idea, “Let's make Brad walk toward food.” So, she would put food in front of me, and her husband, Steve, held on to me to make sure I wouldn’t fall, as Pam moved backward holding a banana. Steve gradually let me go and thus I relearned how to walk once again because FOOD was my motivation. (Thank you, Pam, for that huge, humongous amount of encouragement and also divine inspiration.)
Also, while I was still an inpatient at both Children’s and Good Samaritan Hospitals my Grandpa Bill Martin was always the first person to visit me every morning making absolutely, positively certain that all of the doctors and nurses were doing everything possible in order to make me better. After the Good Lord called him to go and reside with Him in Heaven, at the end of his Mass, my eldest sibling, P.J., gave a Eulogy, during which part of that Eulogy he mentioned how Grandpa cared for me. During the entire time that he spoke of that, I was C.O.L. (Crying Out Loud.)
One other thing about when I was in both hospitals is that a friend of my Dad’s, Paul Heisel, informed him of a massage therapist by the name of Sister Ruth Ellen Ray. She would come and massage me with her friend, Barbara Ann Leister, who would pray over me while Ruth massaged me. I almost always enjoyed it thoroughly whenever they would come. I can recall my sister, Rita telling me that, when Ruth just began massaging me, shortly after I came out of my coma, I would cuss because it hurt so much when she hit my pressure points. I nicknamed her MTD. (Standing for MASSAGE THERAPIST DEAREST.) After Ruth and Barb moved out of the Greater Cincinnati area, they wrote me a letter. In a part of that letter, Ruth wrote, “I miss you, nobody here calls me MTD.”
Gratitude
I have been extremely fortunate to be blessed with the world's greatest parents and siblings in this whole, entire world to assist me through all of the various adversities that I've come upon since my injury. After my incident, my eldest sibling, P.J., and his wife, Gwen, gave up their lunch hour to visit me in the hospitals daily. My oldest sister, Pam, and her husband, Steve, moved from a very comfortable lifestyle in Chicago to Cincinnati to help out with me. Pam got a new job, and Steve, well, he switched law schools. My middle sister, Rita, moved from an apartment back home to help out. My youngest sister, Kim, transferred from Miami University to Xavier University to be closer to home, and my youngest sibling, Matthew, had to give up his spot as the baby of the family because I was now the one who needed the most attention. My parents did each and everything else possible in order to make me better.
While my sister, Rita, was attending Xavier University, she was befriended by an XU basketball player named Walt McBride.
When I was still hospitalized, Rita and Walt would come to Good Samaritan Hospital and help me shower and get me ready for bed. I would constantly battle with Walt about my taking a shower. I would become very irritable and upset with Walt but, since he is much bigger and stronger than me, he obviously won the fights. After I returned home from the hospital, Walt would come over to my parent's house and visit me, and became very close to my family.
Because my Dad and sister, Rita are both XU graduates, my family and I are great Xavier fans. Once, when I was still in a wheelchair before one of XU’s home games began, I was sitting courtside. When they were announcing the players, beyond our knowledge, Walt arranged it for all of the Xavier players to come up and give me a ‘high five’. That most unquestionably was one particularly memorable game for me. After the game, Walt invited me to come into the locker room. That certainly was quite a thrill.
Over the years my family and I have remained very close friends with Walt. When he got married to his wife, Kim, Rita, her husband, Chris, my Mom, and I attended their wedding on a BB Riverboat on the Ohio River. It was most sure enough one especially fun wedding to attend.
Besides being blessed with an excellent immediate family, the Good Lord has also blessed me with many wonderful cousins, uncles, and aunts. For example, my Aunt Claire, my godmother, who brought Holy Communion to me when I was too sick to make it to Mass. Also, my cousin, Jeff, who, despite being extremely busy with his own family, takes time out of his busy schedule to take me on 25-mile bike rides on my tandem bicycle. Which sure enough is great exercise and also balls full of fun.
My parents are blessed with 14 grandchildren and four great-granddaughters. I’m one extraordinarily proud godfather to five of them. My eldest godchild is Justin, followed by Madelyn, then comes Anthony, then comes Elyse, and last there is Everly. I most certainly do love each and every one of my godchildren immensely and I know they love me in return.
When I was still in my coma, Matthew created an audiotape for me, on his Fisher Price tape recorder. In a part of that tape, he mentions that I am his best, best, best buddy in this whole, entire world. After I came out of my coma and was well enough to comprehend what he was saying on that tape, I remembered how, during the summer of 1984, I would babysit, and was an especially mean brother to him. I felt exceedingly guilty.
One other thing that happened while I was still in my coma is that my parents wrote a letter to Gerry Faust when he was still the head football coach at the University of Notre Dame informing him of my situation. They told him that I was a BIG Notre Dame fan and asked if, when he came to town, would come over to Cincinnati Children's Hospital and visit me–which is exactly what he did. He brought with him Allen Pinkett's jersey. Before Gerry left my parents and me in my hospital bed, he told my parents that, when he got back to Notre Dame, the first place that he would go to is The Grotto. He told them, “I'll light a candle to the Blessed Virgin Mary asking that Brad comes out of his coma. Tell me when something good happens.” He didn't say if, he said WHEN. Well, two weeks later, my Mom called Gerry informing him that I most certainly did come out of my coma.
Since then, Gerry and I have remained the best of friends. He wrote a book that came out in the mid to late ‘90s entitled, "The Golden Dream." In part of chapter three and also in part of page 193 of that book, he mentions me. In a part of chapter three, he writes about a letter that he received from me shortly before he was supposed to speak to the Elder High School student body while I was still attending school there. He writes about a P.S. that I added in that letter that truly touched him. In my P.S. I wrote, "As you know, I was on the swim team this school year. Every time I swam I came in last place but I tried. My times have gotten better every meet. I'll do better next year. ‘Brad's Gonna Make It!!! “
Even though I don't remember very much at all about my visit to Children's Hospital, I distinctly recall one nurse who took excellent care of me there by the name of Nurse Starkey (Ethel Howard), with whom I kept in touch until when the Good Lord brought her home to reside with Him in Heaven. Starkey would call my parents whenever something positive happened. For example, the first time I pointed to the urinal, the first time I swallowed, and also the first time I sucked on a popsicle stick. After my brain surgery, I was sent to the intensive care unit of CHMC for two weeks. From there, I was sent to the step-down unit. In the 1980s, nurses had regular shifts, and I was fortunate enough to have Nurse Starkey as my nurse.
After spending three months at Children’s Hospital and then another three months at Good Samaritan Hospital, as an inpatient, I was finally able to come home. However, I did continue outpatient therapies for many years--yes, many arduous, painstaking, and difficult therapies to aid in my recovery.
Road to Recovery
During the autumn of 1985, my parents attended a tennis camp in Hilton Head Island, South Carolina. While they were there, at the camp, they met a woman named Margaret Gornik. My parents were telling her a little bit about my injury and she told them how she has a reading and spelling program called GRASP, which stands for GORNIK READ AND SPELL PROGRAM. I worked with her for the first time during Christmas of 1985 then, once again, during Easter of 1986. She is one sensational teacher. Before I worked with her I was reading very little but, afterward, she got me reading much better. One of the most important things that she taught me was what to do when I get down and in the dumps. She taught me that when that happens to do three things.... 1) Ask Jesus for assistance, 2) Think of something positive, and then 3) Get busy, busy, busy. That most definitely has assisted me immensely whenever I become depressed, (which, lately has been very seldom).
There’s good that comes from adversity. For example, two of my sisters met their husbands due to my injury. My sister, Kim, met her husband, Tony, while attending Xavier University’s summer school. The reason she took summer school is that she missed some college credits visiting me. My other sister, Rita, met her husband, Chris, because a therapist of mine found out that Rita was single and she and I matched her up with Chris.
My friend, Gerry Faust.
Friends
Six days after my traumatic brain injury, a friend of mine from both Our Lady of Victory grade school and Elder High School, Sean, came to my parent's house, on his bike, with a Get Well Soon card for me. My parents told him that it was very nice of him to think of me. Then, Sean shared with my parents that in grade school, he was bullied and not accepted into the ‘in-group’, then he told them how I would always stick up for him.
While attending school together at Elder, Sean encouraged me to join the swim team. He would come to pick me up for either swim practices or swim meets, and I would almost always make him wait until when I got into his car, but he would never complain.
Over the years Sean and I have remained wonderful friends. Even today Sean stays in touch with my family and me. He considers my Mom and Dad as his second parents.
When I was attending school at Elder, especially during my freshman year, practically every Friday night, all of my friends would go out and attend, “THE FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS”, the high school football, basketball, and baseball games, then, afterward, open parties, and the majority of the time I’d be stuck, left at home with my parents. I would become very upset because I truly wanted to go out and have some fun with my friends. When I eventually did go out with my friends, almost as soon as I got into their cars, I’d become very sleepy. At the open parties, I’d fall asleep.
Once, while attending an open party, I started spacing out. This one girl looked at me and said, “Man, this guy must be completely hammered.” I asked her, “Who, me?” She replied, “Yes, you.” I responded back to her by saying, “No, I haven’t drunk anything. I’m just really tired.” My friends stuck with me and every year I became a little more and more fun to be with.
There’s another very good friend of mine from Elder High School named Tom Bonhaus who resides in Tuscaloosa, Alabama with his wife and their four daughters. Since they’ve resided there Tom and I’ve been corresponding back and forth by way of first letters and now emails. Once, I wrote him a letter and was wondering if he had received it, so I called his parent’s number, and Tom’s younger brother, Matt, answered the phone. During our conversation, Matt informed me that on Tuesday evenings he attended Mass, then afterward, they’d socialize. (The name of the Catholic group is called RIVER.) I asked him if he could possibly please pick me up and take me to Mass. He answered me by saying, “Sure.” Since then, Matt and I’ve been terrific friends. He’s taken me to many Masses, various retreats, and other RIVER activities. Matt met his beautiful wife, Callie, at Tuesday Night’s Masses.
Another very good friend of mine that I met through RIVER is a man by the name of Joseph. Even though he resides all of the way up in Dayton, he drives down to pick me up when I used to reside in Mount Adams and now in Madeira and has taken me to retreats and other RIVER activities. He has three adult children, who all are very loving and caring individuals, just like their Father. Joseph likewise met his beautiful wife, Kathleen, at Tuesday Night’s Masses, too.
Faith
Even though Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ has allowed my incident to occur, He most definitely, without a doubt, has blessed me with an excellent family and many wonderful friends to assist me through all of the various adversities that I've had come upon since my head injury, and I'm forever grateful to Him for doing that for me.
While I was still an inpatient at both Children's and Good Samaritan Hospitals, various friends of mine would come over to visit and cheer me up. Every Tuesday, two ladies named Patty Miller and Jill Benkert would come and decorate my room for various holidays. My Mom told me that she would hear their footsteps coming up to my hospital bedroom. They always lifted my spirits whenever they would come to visit me.
Shortly after my TBI, my parent's neighbor, Betty Kelley, informed them of a Roman Catholic priest named Fr. Al Lauer. He most definitely, without a doubt, is one extremely holy man. He had said many Masses at my parents’ house. After I graduated from Elder High School, we had a Mass there and then afterward a party at my parents' side yard, and at the beginning of that Mass, he said, "Wow, standing room only on Riverama Drive."
While I was residing at my parent's former house (and attending high school), in Mount Adams, and also in Madeira, I was a Eucharistic Minister at each of the parishes where I worshiped. I thoroughly relish doing that because every time I did that ministry I knew I was becoming closer and closer to Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
When my nephews and nieces were attending high school, college, and beyond before they would take their tests or exams either their mothers or they would send me a text message asking me to pray for the success of their tests/exams. I nicknamed it TAP. (Standing for TEXT A PRAYER.) Also, since my injury, I've prayed over and for many different people. I truly treasure praying for and with individuals who are in need because I know that I'm doing the Lord’s Will.
I used to pray for and over a former teacher of mine from Diamond Oaks named Mrs. Bennie Jackson. She was in and out of various hospitals for many years until when Jesus brought her home to reside with Him in Heaven. I most definitely love her, and she, beyond any doubt, loves me.
Once, while attending school at Diamond Oaks, before school began, I stopped by Bennie’s classroom and told her, “Mrs. Jackson, this morning I weighed myself and I weighed 150 lbs.” She replied by saying, “Brad, do you know that if I didn’t love you I’d smack you."
On Wednesday, June 30, 2021, Bennie passed away. My Mom and I attended her funeral service, held at The Assembly of God Church located in Fairfield, Ohio. We were both elated that we did indeed attend the service. It was one, especially spiritual and uplifting service. Her daughter, Nichole, and husband, Norley, were very grateful that we were there. We both felt very blessed that we did indeed attend the service. We knew that Bennie was up there in Heaven, looking down, and was very pleased. During her service, there was beautiful singing, clapping of hands, and hallelujahs, especially during the singing of Amazing Grace. We most definitely, without a doubt felt the presence of Our Almighty Lord.
Education
After I returned home from the hospital, I had very little, if any at all, knowledge and no idea of where I was going to attend high school but fortunately for me, Father Tom Kuhn, then principal at Elder High School, contacted my parents and asked, "What can Elder do for Brad?" They created a special program for me there with one-on-one tutoring and also mainstreamed in some (regular) classes.
When I was taking physical education class, during my freshman year, I couldn’t even change my own clothes by myself but a wonderful student by the name of Jim Hilvert helped me in this area. If he weren’t there to assist me, I assume, by the time I’d finished changing my clothes, the class would have been over.
While attending school at Elder I wanted to participate in some extracurricular activities, so, I joined the swim team, (as I’ve already mentioned), and the Glee Club. At the beginning of my first year of being involved with the Glee Club, my Junior year there, I was playing in a friendly soccer game. It was The Glee Club versus The Band. During that game, a fellow Glee Club member, and became a great friend of mine, Tom Reiring, would call me by name asking me to pass the ball to him. I’d do that, then I’d ask him, “What’s your name?” He’d say, “My name’s Tom.” Now, this same thing happened multiple times during that game and I kept asking Tom that same question. The last time I asked him that question, in frustration, he uttered out by saying, “My name’s Tom Damn It.” After he said that I said, “If your name is Tom Damn It, then my name must be Brad Damn It.” Since then Tom, two other friends of ours from Glee Club Dave, Mike, and I have been The DAMN IT BROTHERS.
At my Elder graduation ceremony, held on Tuesday, June 4th of 1989, I received a certificate of attendance and the Altiora Award, which is Latin for “Strive for the Higher Things.” This special award is given to one graduating senior each year at Elder High School. When the principal called me to receive this award, I wasn’t paying attention and didn't hear him mention my name but the guy sitting next to me, Keith Weisman, said to me, “Brad, it’s you, get up there.”
When I graduated from Elder I didn't have enough credits to graduate with a high school diploma, so, the following two school years, I attended Diamond Oaks Joint Vocational School. Then, in June of 1991, I finally received my long-awaited high school diploma at Oak Hills High School graduation. (Oak Hills was my home school while I was attending Diamond Oaks.)
From there I was enrolled in a two-year, ungraded, program in a suburb of Chicago called Evanston, Illinois. The name of the program that I was involved with is titled The P.A.C.E. Program. The P.A.C.E. Program is designed for young adults who have learning disabilities. There, I learned how to live independently in a dormitory and also I learned a job skill, which, for me was childcare.
When I was just beginning school there, especially during my first week, I was basically homesick constantly and really wanted to quit and come back home to Cincinnati. My parents had to practice ‘tough love’ and tell me that I had to stay there to learn how to become a more independent individual.
Also, while attending school there, in January of 1992, a teacher of mine, Mrs. Jane Doyle, introduced me to a man by the name of Patrick Henry Hughes Jr. Pat is the founder of an organization called Natural Ties. Natural Ties was created to integrate individuals with disabilities with college students at various campuses around the country.
Meeting George Herbert Walker Bush
When I was still a P.A.C.E. student, Pat was my Natural Ties buddy. He has been one excellent friend to me. He has taken me to many places. For example, he's taken me to two Chicago Bulls games, when Michael Jordan was still playing for them. Also, on Tuesday, March 3rd, 1992, he arranged for me to meet and have my picture taken with the former and late President George Herbert Walker Bush at Chicago O'Hare International Airport.
A side story about after I met the President is that it was extremely cold on that day when Pat and I met President Bush and I started shivering. So, one of the President's secret service men let me borrow his overcoat until when I warmed up. Also, after I warmed up, we got a tour of Air Force I. That airplane is EXTREMELY LUXURIOUS.
Move to Mt. Adams
After I graduated from The P.A.C.E. Program at the beginning of June 1993, I moved into my own apartment located in a part of Cincinnati called Mt. Adams. After living there for three years, I moved into a condominium in the same part of Cincinnati and lived there for 17 years.
While in Cincinnati, I kept my connection with Pat Hughes and Natural Ties through that program at Xavier University. My Natural Ties buddy was an (at that time) student (but now an XU graduate) by the name of Dan Carpenter. When Natural Ties just began at XU, Cincinnati Channel 9’s News did a news clip about that and I was in the clip. I thought I was a real local celebrity.
On Thursday, June 6th of 1996, for the Atlanta Olympics, I had the once-in-a-lifetime fortune of running with The Olympic Torch. The reason I received this opportunity is that my brother-in-law, Chris Jacobs, wrote a paper about me, nominating me. In part of the paragraph nominating me, Chris wrote, “Brad inspires everybody whom he knows and meets.”
I ran with the torch from Northern Kentucky to a bridge that crosses from Kentucky to Ohio called the John A. Roebling Suspension Bridge. Midway through the bridge, I passed the torch off to a famous retired NBA star by the name of Oscar Robertson. My namesake nephew, Bradley, got The Big 'O's autograph. It was most sure enough was one exhilarating, thrilling night.
A couple of weeks before I ran with the Olympic Torch Cincinnati Channel 9 News had a news clip about me being selected to be a Olympic Torch bearer.
Shortly before I began to run with the Olympic Torch, a terrible rain and thunderstorm were coming through the Greater Cincinnati area at that time, so, I was safe in a van waiting for the storm to pass by, while my family and friends were in various bars and restaurants downtown Cincinnati and Northern Kentucky. Then, the storm finally passed by and I began running. By viewing the above photograph isn't it quite obvious that I’m absolutely, positively, completely, and 100% PUMPED UP thoroughly!!!!!!!!!!!!!
While residing in Mt. Adams, some of my siblings lived nearby. Slowly, but surely, they moved off The Hill. So, my family and I figured it was best for me to move as well. In September 2013, I moved out of Mt. Adams to Madeira, where I currently reside.
Move to Madeira
The weekend I moved from Mt. Adams to Madeira I gave a farewell speech at the three different Masses at the Church that I attended while residing in Mt. Adams--Holy Cross / Immaculata Church. After the first and third times I spoke, I received standing ovations. That most definitely, without a doubt, made me feel stupendous because that meant that I did a marvelous job presenting my speech.
Madeira is a fantastic place for me to reside, because, since I'm unable to drive, I'm able to use a service called The Heel-Toe Express practically everywhere that I have to be. For example, I’m able to walk to and from St. Gertrude Church, Kroger Grocery Store, some restaurants, Walgreens Drug Store, and some of my doctors’ appointments.
To celebrate my 50th year of life, I wanted to have a BIG birthday bash and my parents agreed on that. So, on Friday, January 10th, 2020, exactly one week prior to my actual birthday, we had this party. My party was held at The Davie Community Center at Twin Lakes Retirement Home, where my parents reside. There were approximately 65 people, both family members and some friends of mine who have supported me over the years present at this party. The highlight of the evening was when Tom Reiring, by the way, is currently employed at Elder, presented me with my Honorary High School Diploma from ELDER HIGH SCHOOL. After that was over, all of the Elder faithful stood up and sang the Elder Alma Mater together. It most definitely was one sensational party.
Employment
Over the years I’ve had many different types of employment, some I enjoyed and some not too much. The first-ever job I held was at my family business, Arling Lumber Company, during the summertime while I was attending school at Elder, doing clerical work.
While I was attending school at Diamond Oaks I worked as a stock clerk at the Kroger Grocery Store on Delhi Pike, which is where my siblings and I were born and raised. When I was working there, I had very little, if any problem with stocking the shelves but I had one extremely difficult task with conditioning or straightening up the aisles. My boss was constantly on my case about me not conditioning the aisles perfectly.
Fortunately for me, I was able to quit that job and started working at Christ Hospital as a pharmaceutical messenger. I thoroughly enjoyed that job totally and completely, 100% for two reasons: 1) because, I found it very fun walking up and down the various levels of the hospital delivering the prescriptions to the other levels of the hospital, and, 2) because, on my final day of employment there, they had a surprise farewell party for me. That most certainly made me feel tremendous because that meant that my boss and fellow employees enjoyed working with me as much as I liked working with them. As all good things must come to an end, they got rid of pharmaceutical messengers because they now tube the prescriptions up and down the levels of the hospital, which is much faster. So much for modern technology.
From there I left for school in Evanston, Illinois. After I graduated from the program there, my first place of employment was at Bally Total Fitness, working in their nursery, and babysitting children while their parents worked out. I really liked that job because I enjoyed playing with the children and also because, after work, I was able to work out free of charge. This job helped me develop good effective communication skills. Then, I worked at Franciscan Health & Fitness Center, doing the same type of work that I did at Bally Total Fitness.
After that employment, I worked at 5/3rd Bank, as a mail sort technician. There, I also delivered various files from one area of the department to another location. I worked there for 11 ½ years, the longest job I’ve ever held, (not including my current job). From there I worked at The Kroger Co. in Madeira as a bagger.
Then, I was employed at a company titled InRETURN. This company was solely created to employ individuals who suffered head injuries, like me. There, I worked as an associate who did single manageable tasks.
After my employment there ended I was unemployed for a time until when I was, once again, hired at the Madeira Kroger Grocery Store as, once again, a bagger. I’m enjoying my job there on my second time around and hopefully, I’ll be able to keep my job there for a long, long, long time.
From 1994-1995 until the present school year, I’ve been a motivational speaker, traveling to various grade schools and high schools around the Greater Cincinnati area and speaking to students on behalf of a platform called The Think First Program. At the end of my speech, I say, “Some of you might think that my severe head injury was an accident, but, in reality, it was an incident that would have been preventable had I worn a helmet.” I truly enjoy thoroughly doing this because I know that I’m reminding young people to think before they act and preventing them from suffering anything similar to what happened to me.
‘When I turned 16 years of age, I really and truly wanted to be able to legally possess a driver's license, but, due to right-side peripheral blindness that I have, due to the stroke I suffered while I was still in my coma, I know that most likely will never happen. I had to deal with this by using other ways of transportation. I dealt with this by when I used to reside in Mt. Adams and currently in Madeira, I’m able to walk practically everywhere that I have to be in those two different communities, and that has worked out very well for me.
My Dad, Paul John Arling
On Saturday, September 10th, 2022 my father passed away from complications due to Lewy Body dementia and Parkinson’s disease.
My Dad's funeral liturgy was held at All Saints Catholic Church in Montgomery, Ohio. Before Mass began, P.J. gave a Faith of Remembrance about Dad. It was a beautiful tribute to him. My dad always put Jesus first in his life and that was especially obvious by how many people attended the Mass and said so many kind words about him.
I unquestionably do miss my dad, but at the same time we all know, “Absence from the body means presence with the Lord.” He most definitely, without a doubt is looking down from Heaven and taking care of all of us here on Earth.
Some of the lifelong lessons that my Dad taught me are the following:
1) He taught me to be a Man for others.
2). He also taught me that not everybody is the same. Religion, race, and culture may be different, but I should love them no matter what.
My Dad was a terrific husband to my Mom all those 63 + years that they were married and they loved each other immensely. He admired her because she was a stay-at-home Mother and raised their six children. (With some or more like a lot of assistance from Pops).
My parents did an excellent job in getting me back to the level that I’m up to today from my TBI. They dealt with my traumatic head injury by they were always ready, willing, and eager to pray for, over, and with me. My parents used to be involved with the National Head Injury Foundation (NHIF) of Greater Cincinnati. Sometimes, as they’ve learned, the stress on the family of the brain-injured individual can lead to the parents getting divorced. Fortunately, for my parents, with assistance from The Almighty Lord, they’ve remained a very close, loving, married unit.
I’ve been living with my traumatic brain injury for 40 years now and I know that the dream of “BRAD's GONNA MAKE IT” will become a reality!!!!!!!!
Thank You
If it weren’t for my parents and my mutual friend, Jere Bennette, insistence and constant encouragement to write this autobiography, my story would have never been written.